.

  However, I'm deeply hurt by C's words. Having to say that I'm incapable of handling the store and worried about the store well being because it's the second most earning store in her region, it hurts. I've tried my best to manage the store, keeping everything on track. But yet, it's never good enough. I was employed as a Fashion Advisor, not a Second-in-charge, not an acting Shop Manager. Naturally, having a FA to take over a shop manager's workload IS a problem to begin with and having you to trust J's words or not, the workload is different, it's not easy for me to handle everything in a short period of time. You should know it crystal clear that it's a bad idea to let me take over the shop, because I'm young and inexperienced. After having me to take over the shop and criticizing me of being incapable of handling the store is not an opportunity to blame me for your misjudgment. Not only you make me feel worthless and useless, you make me doubt my belonging to the company. In a few days time, it's gonna be the 9th month working in R. But yet, I'm still not a confirm staff. 3 months past, I wasn't confirm as it was supposed to be. I thought, it's okay maybe I'm not good enough, I needa try harder. Slowly, the 4th, 5th and subsequent months pass, I begin to question, does the problem lies in me, or issit the company not appreciating my existent. I used to not care about the status I am in, because I was happy, happy working in Tampines. It's gonna be 9 months, if you gonna tell me after 9 fucking months and I'm still not up to a FA standard, I'm speechless. I'm beyond speechless. Not only I do not enjoy the privileged of a full timer, I feel like a piece of trash that nobody wants to pick up to throw it away. You feel me? No. In this 9 months, everytime I'm sick, I'm taking unpaid leave. Fine, I'm fine with it. But when my grandmother pass away, I've to take unpaid leave too. Do I deserve this? 

  To add on, you mention to the visitor that I'm here for the money only, I'm not totally devoted to the store. I've no idea the credibility of the VM girl's words. But it sure hurts and made me cry after hearing them. The primary reason that everybody is working their ass off, IS because of money. Don't you? If I am desperate for the money, I would have make a big fuss every single time I took unpaid leave. But I didn't. After 9 months, I've yet to do anything to achieve what I deserve. I'm greedy for the money? No. What hurts the most is when you said I'm not devoted to the store. Yaknow what? I'm more than devoted, I treat it as my second home and sometimes more than that. I insist of participating in the midnight VM change, because I wanted to gain more experience, I wanted to be a part of it. After midnight VM change, I cabbed home, bathed, and went back straight to the store for my morning shift. If I'm not devoted, I must be foolish for committing my time to the store yeah? The day my grandmother pass away, I couldn't head down to see her for the last time. Because I was the only full timer working, I couldn't leave the store unattended. Family and work, I choose work. Not devoted? I must be heartless. I've never done any housework at home, but yet, I clean up the whole store like it was my home. I scrapped off every single sticker stain I could possibly removed, I dust off every area. Not devoted? I must be more keen to be a cleaner.

  I started off as a staff at Ion, after a month, I was than told I'm being transferred to Tampines. No discussions were made, I was given less than 2 days notice before I've to report to Tampines. I wasn't given a reason why I was transferred, I've to find out the reason myself. And you guys have to lied to me saying there was a reshuffling of staff. In the end, who was being reshuffled? Only me. Just because a staff was terminated, I was chosen to replace her. I questioned my ability of being a full timer back than, and felt that they wanted to get rid of me to a smaller store because I'm an eyesore. I was just starting to get to know my colleagues in Ion, but than I've to adapt to the changes again. All was well in Tampines, I can say a strong bond was build, and than you guys want me to go back to Ion just for two days. In the beginning, you said I've to go there until J's back from annual leave. But the arrangement wasn't logical at all. By right, Wednesday, Friday and Saturday I've to head down to Ion because Thursday and Sunday is my off day. That's the logical arrangement. But you want me to head back to Tampines on Saturday because you couldn't find a staff to replace. You fooling me no? I was feeling terribly unwell so I've to take UNPAID LEAVE, on these days. And yet, you insist of me going to Ion on Monday and Tuesday. Maybe you're getting back at me because you thought I'm faking to be sick, or maybe you feel that I can learn more from A. Let me tell you something, for the one month I was working there, I've learnt nothing. In fact, she treated me as a part timer. But after I've been transferred, I've learnt tons of things from J. I was immediately taught how to do opening, closing, I feel useful and important as a full timer in that shop. For the one month I've been working in Ion, I've learn nothing, what makes you think that in 2 days, 18 hours, I will learn anything useful from A? I doubt that. I doubt her ability and the time she's able to fork out to carefully teach me more things.

  All in all, I feel like I've been toyed from the start until now. I wasn't appreciated and clearly my existent was mistreated. The reason why I refuse to head back to Ion it's because I find it no point as clearly two days to Ion is more like a punishment made because I made you embarrass in front of the visitor. AMK had their sales gondola out front too, why am I the only one being blame and vent your anger on? If you guys insist of having me to head down to Ion just for two days, I really don't see a point in continue the job that don't value me. Nonetheless, not given the full privileged of a full timer. You guys can go ahead and terminate me because I will not head down to Ion and letting you guys fooled around any longer. You might think that I'm being childish, but this is the only pride I've left. It's not a small issue to me at all, it's my pride, my self-worth at stake.